Q: At what age do I become a man?

Legally manhood is when you turn the ages of either 18 or 21, depending on where you live in the world. At 18 or 21 years old the law considers you to have the right mental development to make your own decisions and to face the consequences of your choices and decisions. Does this simply mean that manhood is determined by age alone? By all means no!! Legally manhood is determined by age but practically manhood goes far beyond ones age. Manhood is determined by responsibilities, choices and your capacity to love. Someone can be a man according to their age but a boy according to their actions and decisions, part of being a man is taking responsibility of all your priorities and actions.

Manhood is not purely about getting it right but about assuming one’s responsibilities that is what being a man is, the ability to have a go at your responsibilities despite the outcome. Part of being a man is the ability to make strong, decisive and consistent choices. A man should be consistent, strong and decisive in his decision making but it does not mean he does not get it wrong. Another Part of being a man is facing up to the wrong choices you have made and soldiering on. Finally to be a man is to pursue love, love is patient, and love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, and it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres.

 A 14 year old boy can have the above qualities and be considered a man. In some countries young boys as young as 10 years old go to work to provide food in various orphaned families. These young boys are considered to be the heads of their family and the men of the house. They assume the role of the parent or primary care giver. These young ‘boys’/ men provide love and support to their younger siblings, they make sure everyone has eaten, provide emotional stability, security, love and financial support. In contrast what would one call a 30 year old man who refuses to take the responsibilities of providing food, shelter and love for his children? A 30 year old man who refuses to embrace these qualities can still be a man but it does not necessarily mean that he is fulfilling the role of a man.

Important contacts for support In Australia

City Care: https://hillsong.com/citycare/

Mind Spot Clinic– 1800 61 44 34– free online telephone clinic- adults
Web: https://mindspot.org.au/urgent-help

Headspace– 1800 650 890– free online telephone clinic for young people 12- 25

Important contacts for support Internationally

Men’s discipleship network: http://www.mensdiscipleshipnetwork.com/

AR Bernard: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LjX9g7nBi_4

TD Jakes: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M2cpRaZRu90

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